Me, Mine, Mo

Tonight i went to my first yoga class in ... oh, a few years. It was heavenly. The instructor was feeling a bit under the weather and so we spent the entire class doing floor poses. Loved it. It was perfect for me. I realized how much i missed paying attention to *me.* Since most of my focus in life now is attending to the needs of others and making sure they are staying healthy and safe, it was great to slow down and breathe and just notice how my body is. And paying attention to oneself in yoga is quite different than just taking some personal time to go sit in a cafe or something. I have missed that. (the yoga thing. the cafe thing too, but i do actually do that occasionally).

anyhoo, it was also my first time going out in the evening (albeit early) since Liam was born for longer than a run to the store. I rushed home knowing that he would be ready to nurse, and like a dog knows when it's owner is turning down the street after work before she is in sight, Liam was crying for me as i walked in the door. As i sat to nurse him on our (new!! new!! heavenly!!) couch, Raelin began to line up her babies beside us. It's a motley crew of little fairies, a rattling stuffed elephant, a much-worse-for-wear grayish (read: used to be white) lamby and little lamby, puppies, etc...Many have dozens of bandages affixed all over their plush little limbs from the awesome Dr. Raelin kit her grandparents (kevin's mom and dad) made for her for Christmas. Since Bill is a vet, the dr. kit contains many more exciting things than your standard toy-doctor kit offerings. There's a real plastic syringe (sans needle, of course) swabs, co-ban wrap, tape, bandages of various sizes and shapes, surgical caps, irrigation syringe (aka: surgery bottle) and one most interesting device which brings us to our title: me, mine, mo.

so, raelin has her babies lined up in a neat little row. about 8 of them, give or take. she begins at one end of the line and begins to point at each one, saying in turn, "me, mine, mo... me, mine, mo..." Up and back down the line she goes. "me, mine, mo...me, mine, mo..." After about the 3rd round i get it and begin to crack up.

It's her version of "Eeny, Meeny, Miney, Mo" of course. Except this is all she remembers and the "catch a tiger by the toe" bit and all the rest of it has been left out- until she is finally ready to wrap it up and gets to the last part:

"And you're the one who gets the catheter!" she exclaims happily to the lucky baby, and up it's plucked for the most exciting doctoring of all: the administering of the catheter!

i've seen some bumper stickers lately that were worth remembering:

"Someone else for President"

(because really, anyone is better than GW)

"When Jesus said Love your Enemy, I think he meant don't kill them"

(just FYI for the religious right...)

"After we spread democracy in Iraq, could we get a little over here?"

(pretty please?)

and on my friend Anna's car...

"I love my country, but i think we should start seeing other people"

******* In other news....

Some of you know that before Christmas, i went to a naturopath and a food allergy test done. The doc took a sample of blood and sent it off to a lab where they tested it against about 150 or so common foods. While they tested, i had 2 blissful weeks of ignorance when i ate as much of anything that i wanted, all the while knowing that soon the party was over.

and over it is.

my results:

cow's milk (and all its gazillion variations that appear in..well, most foods. especially the tasty kind)
yogurt (but not cheese... go figure)
blueberries (huh?i live in Maine for crying out loud!)
sesame
lobstershrimpandcrab (basically, one big shellfish)
baker's yeast (uh huh)
brewer's yeast (yup... no beer or wine :(
rye (whatever)
egg whites (WTF?)

I think that's "it".
The dairy was not really a surprise. I suspected that. And having eliminated dairy for Liam's first 3 months because it clearly bothered him, i have dabbled in those waters and its not all that terrible. Soy ice-cream has come a long way.

However. Those dairy free waters had many of those other things in them. In fact, those things are in most of the foods i eat *every day*.

yeast, for crying out loud?!!?

Sigh.

I am not sure what possessed me to do this, but it had something to do with getting rid of migraines and figuring out why my skin freaks out every now and then. i'm beginning to think that those things were not a bad tradeoff. But the thing is, until i eliminate these food items for up to 6 weeks (ideally more like 8-12) and then re-introduce them one by one, i really won't have any idea of what my allergic reaction is. It's not like i need an epi pen for eating a blueberry. So while in fact my body is producing immunoglobins (or is it goblins?) in response to these foods, some of the reactions may not even be noticable, in which case, i can eat them on limited, rotation basis (every 4 days the lab says) (is that after midnight, i wonder...?). But others may infact be the migraine culprit. and once you do eliminate and your body flushes them out, the reactions when you reintroduce are much easier to detect. like, instant migrane or hives or something (greeeaaaattttt....) It's hard to know until one eliminates.

So, that's what i'm doing. I've discovered the one bread that you can use for toast and sandwiches and whatnot that does not have yeast. Its' ok. I'm trying out all kinds of various milks: almond, hazelnut, rice, soy, oat... just for kicks. Oh, and to not create another sensitivity. Eating too much of one kind of food can infact create sensitivities (but not allergies). I bought _Vegan with a Vengenance_ cookbook for the egg-free, dairy-free baking. Im subbing my favorite meat for tofu and tempeh in all the other stuff (insert evil laugh and hand rubbing here!).

It's a trip. We'll see. I do notice that Liam seems to be sleeping better. Less restless overall, though this could also be because he is not sick. I havent had a migraine, but they were not frequent, so hard to tell if it's as a result of the elimination or not. In anycase, i figure if my immune system is not tied up dealing with pesky food allergies, it has more time and energy on its hands to fight off, oh, i dont' know, say, random bacteria? flu viruses? budding cancer cells? Who knows. I only have one immune system, may as well let it do its work on the important stuff, right?

There are few things sweeter to parents than those moments after all the children are nestled, all snug in their beds...

depending on the child, this could be only 15 minutes, or all night. Mine are somewhere in the middle. Last night was the first night in a string of several nights proceeding it, when i did not sleep airplane-style in the livingroom on the futon with Liam on my chest. When babies have colds, you do not sleep even if you feel great. Course that great feeling is only the first day before the first night when you do the airplane thing. After that night you catch bare glimpses of your eyelids between hacking baby coughs and snuffling baby noises and rocking frustrating, crying sad baby. After that night, though you still may be healthy, you no longer feel great. You feel like shit, more sleep deprived than usual and conflicted: mad as hell at baby for not sleeping, and sad and compassionate for baby because clearly, he would also prefer to be sleeping and just can't.

anyway, last night Liam managed to do about 90% of the night lying down and so therefore today i feel more or less like a wonderwoman with all the sleep i got in comparison. And the great thing about having a second child a few years older is that you have living proof that in fact, the baby will grow up and sleep for hours at a time, lying down, even when ill. It just makes it all a bit easier to bear.

Despite the fact that its' looking like i'll get another better night's sleep, i am still aiming to be in bed by 8pm. that gives me 31 minutes to finish this blog, surf a few sites, brush teeth and go to bed. I'm solo until next Thursday, as Kevmo is at New Job Boot Camp. Raelin and i have made a mini calendar of the next 9 days and posted it on her door. Every night she makes an "X" on the day's square to count down to Daddy's return. This is a much easier concept for her to grasp since we've just done the whole Christmas Advent thing. And counting down to Daddy's return seems to, in fact, be a much better reward than Christmas :) It would be even better if the calendar gave her a little present for each day like the Advent Elf did. Preferably of the chocolate variety.

Sor-Ry!

The other thing that makes me feel like Wonderwoman is taking care of 2 kids by myself from dawn till dusk without maiming/injuring either (by accident or negligence, of course) or making either cry because of my loss of temper (which has happened on previous solo weeks. of course, we're only on day 2, but i'm going for 10).

Yeah, there's something about having 2 small lives entrusted in your hands and then doing pretty well at it all by one's ownself that feels good. I thought taking care of one was worth mentioning- hey, i got two now! And all hail the mama's with more than 2, but, you know, we're talking about me right now...

I remember when Raelin was born and my midwife left to go home a few hours later after we were all checked out pronounced Good.

I was like, um, where are you going? This is a HUMAN BEING! A NEW ONE! I think i'd only held a newborn (new within like a month) maybe twice in my life. I was not much of a babysitter and as a teacher, had no interest in spending my days with any kid younger than 11. Dude, hormones make you do *crazy* things like moon for a baby when you feel the way i did. So, sudddenly having the full responsibility of this new life was pretty, uh, daunting to say the least. But, not only do those hormones make you want to have the baby, they bring their side kick- Biological Instinct- and bam! you are suddenly all, " you have to hold her this way and that cry means she wants to nurse and i think she has gas and ....." its' like crazy hidden knowledge in there. Ok, so _The Baby Book_ by Dr. Sears helps *alot* but still... you Know.

Course, it all gets a bit less straightforward when you actually have to parent them as in guide and discipline and educate and so forth- hence the sense of accomplishment at caring for not one, but two, successfully, by one's self. but i certainly would not want to do this for longer than 9 days. Ok, maybe 12, but longer than that.....ugh.

all hail single moms. (bowing.)

Ok. 16 minutes and i have a few more sites to visit. Hope you all had a happy and fun New Year. I think it was New Year's anyway... i was in bed.

By 9.

Sleeping airplane style.